I have looked away from you and feel so disconnected, yet my love and loyalty to you does not waiver, I disconnect myself not necessarily from you but from the religious rhetoric that has seemed to scar my mind, all the ones that have caused me to feel ashamed of living, feeling, breathing, being. You wait patiently for me to inch my way back to you, you wait patiently when you know, I know I could run there but my caution has disabled my every step, every move. I take steps closer and closer and fear you I will not.