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February 19, 2002
Like a Pavlov dog. I react just walking into a hardware store. The stench of raw fertilizer takes me back home. Summers with dad on the weekends. He always made an excuse to visit the hardware store. I’d travel with him.

It was the only time we ever bonded.

I’d look up and watch him as he paid cash at the register. His clenched teeth with gnawing jaw. The pulse of his cheek as he gnashed his teeth looked adult and sexy. I thought it was a natural “growing up” thing that occurred like your Adam’s Apple and pubic hair.