March 17, 2006
I am not being fair, to anyone. The one I want doesn't want me, but I won't or can't leave him alone. The one I should be with is so nice to me and yet I am silently cruel and disloyal and am storing up cartloads of evidence to push me through the gates of hell. It will be deserved, I can see it slithering closer, but my emotional feet keep walking relentlessly forward. Then there's the one who I should gently turn away as he will be hurt, but I am selfish and crave his smile and soothing words.