March 19, 2006
I was going to stop talking to him, to say that it was madness that we were getting so close, but I realised that this will take a superhuman effort. An effort that I just can't make right now, no matter how many alarm bells are ringing in my head and despite every warning that is etching itself into my brain. I think I am more than a little bit crazy as I keep finding the same path and it always ends in such pain and tears. Why can't I let my life be safe, boring, calm, serene. And ordinary.