April 16, 2003
A decade ago yesterday, I lost my closest friend in the world. I look back on ten years and wonder if there were a single second in it where my soul didn’t ache. After a loss as devastating, there are three levels of forgiveness. The first is to forgive God, who seconds after tragedy receives blame until you realize blame is reserved for accidents, not greater plans. Secondly, you forgive the victim for leaving you alone, all alone. The third forgiveness escapes me, and maybe always will; will I ever forgive myself for never appreciating every second I had him?