Another day where I worked straight through without a lunchbreak, and given/asked for a pile of paraphernalia at the last minute. There's too much to do. I didn't even want to go to the club afterwards but I went, prompted by images of myself alone at home, unable to sleep. You can't always feel an opportunity coming, but you certainly know when you miss one: the hard rock at the bottom of your stomach, swelling as it gorges on doubt, neuroses and futility. The certainty that if you carry on like this you'll one day wake up just a person.