April 8, 2004
There's no hope for change- we're right where she wants to be. About a mile from "mommy"- In her hometown. And we'll never leave, not together, anyway. I've compromised my needs and wants- and she's gotten hers. There's no incentive for her to change anything now- and I'm out in the dark. "don't brood on it" she says- yes, let's control my mind, too! I want to talk- she says "i'm tored- I don;t want to talk now" and goes to bed. Like she has a fucking monopoly on being tired! Well, I'm tired too- of all this crap!!!