I feel like I’m less of a woman because I can’t have kids. Or, presumably, almost certainly cannot have children.

My friends don’t get it. They all say why not adopt? Why not something else?

They can’t understand that, in my mind, it hurts so much to not be able to have children, that, I want something wholly mine or it would just be a constant reminder.

And I would fear not loving that child as much as I could.

And that would make me a horrible mother.

So, I’d rather be miserable and not have children than risk that.