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03/01 Direct Link
I feel everyone slipping away. They're replacing me with someone new, every last one of them. Once I had a place somewhere in their hearts. Now? Who knows? Here's the thing, they all find someone better when I'd gone, but I can't seem to do the same. No one understands, no one knows. And I don't want them to know or see, at the same time, I need someone. Anyone. I am a fucking mess, and I don't have anyone to blame. I dragged myself into the dark and I'd forgotten to tell anyone I'm here.
03/02 Direct Link
That guy hates me. And I wouldn't give a damn if I myself do not love him. People would think otherwise, mom thinks I don't care and dad aren't around enough, but I assure you I'd kill a man if he ever lays a finger on him. After all, he is my little brother. No contempt or dislike could change that, nor would disgust and harsh words do. He doesn't know, nor will he ever do, but he matters to me as much as I do to him. Well, he does think I am the center of my world.
03/03 Direct Link
Someday I'd like to travel the world. Before starting with international travels, I'll explore Indonesia. A month without going back home, a few places I'd love to visit are Lombok and the Gili islands, Belitung, Raja Ampat and the list goes on! And then I'd fly to Venice, Paris, Amsterdam, Spain and all around Europe! Germany would be great, as I'm learning German at school now. A second visit for the Great Wall of China -let's see how far I can go this time! And I'll pick up simple words from languages all over the globe. My, how marvelous, right?!
03/04 Direct Link
I don't hate writing in Bahasa, but it frustrates me. Especially if it's for school. The teacher is so demanding, "write a short story with a morale." and "do not write tragedies." or "you can't end it with him waking up from a dream." and also "do not kill your main character."
Dude, what am I supposed to write about. I can't think of a plot with a morale! I mean, I probably can, but it's hard when you force this. One does not ask someone to write a story, they should that someone to tell his story.
03/05 Direct Link
A teenage girl has a fight with her mom. It was a small and stupid thing, and had not been worth the shouting and yelling at each other's faces, now that she has come to think of it. It's the girl's fault and she's constantly talking back, causing the mom to reach her limit. The girl threatens to run away, and her mom didn't reply.
Still fuming over their fight, the girl steals some cash and heads to a nearby bus station, even though her mom tries to stop her. While queuing in line to get her bus ticket.
03/06 Direct Link
Caius Navarro never knew his mother, but his father he was very proud of. Member of the Inner Circle, Tibe was the king's most skilled guard. The king saw potential in the boy and offered to train him in fighting. Much to both the king's and Caius' dismay, Tibe refused to make his boy a trained soldier. He grew up in the stables instead. But when Tibe was killed by an arrow meant for the king, Caius was ordered to move into the guards' barrack and begin his servitude as the king's men. He then befriends the princess and they
03/07 Direct Link
became the best of friends. They would meet between Caius' never-ending trainings and Kyra's tedious lessons, tell stories and have fun as any normal friends would. The king disapproved of his daughter's friendship with a lowly guard, but he needed Caius to live up to his expectations, so he limited their meetings instead of completely forbidding them. Both disliked the king for this. Meanwhile, outside of the palace, the wizard Zeidan was still terrorizing the kingdom. One day, Zeidan offered an agreement and the king had agreed to give him anything in return for him never returning to Saffronite.
03/08 Direct Link
Zeidan asked for the little princess to be handed over. The kingdom didn't expect it to happen, but the king gave up his only daughter to the evil wizard! "It is one life in trade for thousands. A wise king would not deny such a chance." The kingdom mourned for the loss, but secretly rejoiced over the end of their suffering. Everyone but Caius. He hated the king for stealing his only friend. And he swore Kyra a life promise, "I will find you, and I won't abandon you like your wretched parents have." And Kyra believed him.
03/09 Direct Link
Caius became the most unhappy and upset little boy in the whole kingdom, and this sadness affects his training. A few years back, Caius would do anything to become the king's personal guard, but now he'd give everything to stay as far away from the king. He could run away, but then he wouldn't have the resources and training for the princess' rescue. So Caius performed well enough to stay in the Inner Circle, but not as outstanding as to become in charge and aid the king's every whim. One day, he tells himself, he would flee to his princess.
03/10 Direct Link
Because at the end of the day, I am the world's most selfish and ignorant girl. It does not matter what I think, because she can't spare the minute to listen. Nor does it matter what he does, what he thinks what he doesn't care about what disrespect he shows, because she can't accept anyone insulting his boy. I won't lie and say I don't give a damn but in truth I miss him. Of course, he's always been an cheeky and insolent (don't kill me for thinking it) brother. But I've always loved him, and I always will do.
03/11 Direct Link
Five ways to win my heart,
for imaginary boys who want to.

1. Write me a song, or a poem, or a letter if you want to tell me you love me. I don't care how crappy and cheesy it seems. They are better than the page-long Instagram captions.
2. Don't showcase our love, brag it to me instead.
3. Take me to bookstores, read my favorite book and tell me what you think.
4. Share my wanderlust.
5. Tell me you love me, want me, cherish me and mean it.
03/12 Direct Link
His behaviors are affecting me more than I'd like to admit. He's keeping things from me. I don't want him keeping things from me. I want him to tell me things. Tell me what's going on in his life. I don't even know what's happening. Things are so different it hurts. We were never inseparable, but at least we used to talk. I used to tell him about my friends, all the funny and crazy things that day and he used to listen. He used to tell me what he's thinking and how it'd been in his life beyond home.
03/13 Direct Link
Master Kayra was born a princess, but denied her royal blood the moment his parents, the King and Queen of Saffronite gave her to the hands of a wretched wizard. All to save their kingdom. Sure, it meant trading one life for thousands others, but real parents would somehowfind a way to protect their own child, the eventual successor of their throne. She was only a seven-year old girl when Zeidan took him. It was clear he wanted to raise the girl to his own values and teaching, but no one knew why. Until Kayra decided
03/14 Direct Link
I feel like a bitch for even thinking this, let alone writing this. But that girl is a pain in the (my) ass, and it seems like nobody feels the same way. Everyone else adores her. Because she seems like a real, resourceful, diligent and supportive girl that the whole school (well, perhaps not) wants to be friends with! But I don't. I wish I could go back in time and not be the first girl each of us had talked to. She's clingy and always asks someone to accompany her everywhere she goes, not exaggerating!
03/15 Direct Link
To the upper levels? I can tolerate. The teacher's room? Sometimes. To the restroom? A few times it's fine, because we all do too. But every single toilet visit she needs someone to wait for her, for fuck's sake! This morning she was going to change her pad and asked me to come along! What the heck!? Well, it wasn't the first time I turned a blind eye on her. And to the locker? Just to take your book. Man, they're twenty feet away, you've got to stop! I can go on for days with this!
03/16 Direct Link
Tomorrow is the last day of midterm. Biology and Economics, both of which I'm fortunately not THAT worried about. And then I have a week off (six days, excuse me), which I'll spend in Singapore. But the week right after term break is fully booked with Physics, Maths and TWO Chemistry tests! Can you imagine? Oh, I have to complete my Bahasa task by next week to avoid deduction. And there's this WSC I'm joining and I have A TON of subjects to revise. My memory is now full of pyrimidines, dna and whatnots. My econs is waiting for me.
03/17 Direct Link
I dread tomorrow. It's sports day. I've got nothing against sports, it's just the people and the team that disquiet me. We're all obliged to join one team, and I first chose futsal, because it was what I could play the most -not that I know much. But then that guy approached and said, "Oh, the futsal team is full. Care to join lacrosse?" I was stupid. I said I couldn't play and he said it didn't matter, so I said yes. Fuck it. What if I'm just on the bench? I'm sure I even signed up first!!
03/18 Direct Link
I hate that my brother is getting everything I've ever wanted. Effortlessly. I hate that all the seniors know his name, and what he does best, when they don't even know I exist. Let alone what I do best. Most of all, I hate that I am his older sister. I am not older sister material, and I disgust myself. I don't enjoy knowing that my friends are fond of him while his friends know me as "Dean's sister". You know what? I bet half the teachers and everyone else see me only as "Dean's sister"!
03/19 Direct Link
If I were somebody else, I would not want to be friends with me (I mean, who would?). If I see myself from a stranger's point of view, I bet I would come off as rude (as fuck), arrogant and a bitch kind of girl. At least now I know, why everyone acts that way around me. Why I am 'invisible'. Oh now I know that they see me alright. They simply choose to ignore me, brush off the fact that I exist. That I have this wild chaotic thoughts inside of me. Like explosives. At least now I know.
03/20 Direct Link
Who am I? I am a void in the universe. An invisible thread among the stars among the galaxy among the spectrum of colors and fireworks and passion. I am here, yet I am not here. I am living, yet I am scared of life. I am nobody and you shall remember me as nobody. I am that girl you pass down the hall, I am that boy you see in the coffee shop, I am that woman sitting on the park bench, I am that man walking his dog, I am that baby crying in his mother's arm. Now.
03/21 Direct Link
The stain will not come out, no matter how much you scrub or pour acidic detergent on. It looks like a brown splotch, as if you spilled your morning coffee, or perhaps afternoon tea, and failed miserably to clean it off. However, I am sad to say that the smell will not stay. After a few hours of application, the smell will recede, you will not be able to inhale the stink and rancid odor anymore. But aside from that, I can promise that the stain will last. It will look as dirty, feel as rough and taste as foul.
03/22 Direct Link
I need to correct my life. It's going the wrong way and soon I'll be crashing into a wall. Headfirst. And I would not see it coming, even though I know what's heading my way. I mean, things aren't abject yet but I'm pretty sure I'll be an abhorrent human being, detested by everyone, if I do not change my ways. But how? Nobody's telling me anything! I'm trying to blame the world for how I act towards the world while wishing so hard the world will accept me for who I am. Look at me. I'm a fucking mess.
03/23 Direct Link
Despite the painkillers and the doctor's promise, the throbbing in her head did not abate.
Jerome Santoro was born to become king, but when he fell head over heels for a commoner, he decided to marry the woman and abdicate.
He was abashed by his inability to play soccer.
My mother's behavior is aberrant, she does not normally bring home clients.
His attempts at winning her over was abortive. Their relationship is officially over.
His tutor refused to abridge the hundred-pages article for his ease.
The lady absolved his son for his disrespect.
03/24 Direct Link
Why am I even starting this 'travel blog'? I haven't even gone exploring my own country, let alone the world! I'm only sixteen, a high school student hating her social life and craving to escape her somewhat boring, messy days. I don't go on vacations often, but when I do, my whole bunch of a big family will be along. And I don't mean Mom, Dad and two brothers. I mean, two aunts and uncles, their four children and sometimes, my grandparents. I may take unflattering pictures, even after I have taken a photography class at school, write unimpressive articles.
03/25 Direct Link
Expect a jumble of articles written on various beaches and mountains, from a cabin in the woods, fancy villas and average hotels, lunches in local cafes and dinner in a five-star restaurant. It will be some big family trip from the eyes of a soon-to-be-sixteen year old girl. I am no backpacker, I don't explore native villages hidden in caves. I'm just a typical high school girl, waiting for the school year (that's just begun) to end so she could hop on a plane to a city not so far away. With her twenty family members.
03/26 Direct Link
"Don't pretend to be who you're not, or you might forget who you are."

I'm afraid the symptom's showing. All my life, I have tried so hard, too hard, in fact, to be someone I'm not. I try to act cool, mature and so, but it has only done me bad. I'm lost, I'm starting to forget. I don't know who I am, I'm not sure who I am. I think I'm the "perfect" version of myself, but really, I'm just a confused girl. I always think that I'm right, but really there is nothing right about me.
03/27 Direct Link
My "Fear" list:
-Striking up a conversation with a complete stranger
-Striking up a conversation with someone in WS.
-Looking at them without shying away.
-Cold shower in the morning
-Waking up early during weekends, for a month.
-Going to bed early during weekdays, for a week.
-Working out daily for a week.
-Not eating junk foods, ice cream and fritters for a whole week. That includes french fries. And pizza.
-Actually planning and developing my "idea"
-Actually writing a novel.
-Finishing things I started.
-Classics AND Shakespeare.
03/28 Direct Link
Castiel Loukas pinched his nose, the raking smell of a clogged sewer made him sick, but there was no other way into the fortress, other than the main gate. Normally, he would be more than happy to make an entrance, slashing at throats and disarming guards by a matter of seconds, but this was a special case. A royal castle would be flooding with hundreds of guards at every nooks of the building, and the Samsuc Palace was no exception, no, especially the Samsuc Palace. As the most powerful kingdom in all the land, and home of its royal family
03/29 Direct Link
While everyone dreads report day, I'm always looking forward to them. I have always looked forward to them. I want to know how I'm faring at class, how good I am. No matter how much I sucked that school year, I want to know. Maybe I like competitions, maybe I like winning. Shrug. It's not that I win all the time, but I like the idea. Hell, I'm that person who's always one of the "tops of the class", but never "top of the class". Get it? I'm waiting for Mom to be ready to go.
03/30 Direct Link
Would you rather have a brother or sister?

I have two younger brothers, and we live under the same roof as our four other male cousins and one girl, who are all younger than me. I wouldn't trade them with more sisters, which I technically have none. Brothers are cooler, I must admit, because we don't catfight, we fight. Although nowadays, I'm sure a fair fight would lead me with black eyes and a room in the hospital. Brothers can defend you like sisters never will, and besides, it's cool to be the only girl here.
03/31 Direct Link
I never thought it was hard, really. And I would give anything to do that one minute over again. Presenting in front of the class was one thing, speaking in front of the class with her trying to convince us that it is harder than it looks is another thing. I've never been good at words, not verbally, but words live in my brain, my heart and my soul. When I was up front I was lost for words, I could not conjure proper sentences I could not speak what's buried inside me. It was scary as hell, and frustrating.