REPORT A PROBLEM
I’ve been writing now for quite awhile
smiles crease my face
even though the coronavirus
has kept me in this place
and not where I had intended!
Once again I have had to cancel flights!
I see my precious grandchildren only on the screen.
That’s a such a joy but I also want to stamp my foot!
It just feels mean.
People are dying from this disease
There is also a risk from blood clots
My elder son solicitously suggests
airports are not anyway
the place to go right now.
Will anything ever be the same?
is the anniversary
of my marriage.
I look at the photos of my radiant laughter
another of my shyness
another adjusting flowers
worn by my still little sister.
Another with my husband looking proud!
There’s another of all our flatmates
gathered around us.
It was such a happy household!
A big table, little money but abundant meals
many friends and conversations deep into the night.
We were students with life before us
and certainly knew how the world should work!
When the frame cracks
and I am asked did you love?
I will say YES! Very very much!
I see the date is July fourth
The former American President
has not yet been indicted
but stories are coming out
of how White House officials thought
he was dangerous and deranged.
Shoot them! Call out the army!
Execute whoever let it be known
I was escorted to a bunker
before walking out
across Lafayette Square
and holding a Bible upside down
outside an historic church.
Stories are coming out .
His lawyers will soon be disbarred
his company has been indicted
for major fraud
Yet insurrectionists are apparently “good people“
it was a “love fest“
and people continue to believe.
seeps gently through me
despite a raging wind
shaking the window screens
and rain cascading down my neighbour’s walls.
in gentle sunshine
in this pale golden light
able to rest because I am at home
not needing anything more
than the day brings.
Bathing, doing a little
letting all things mend
and come together
I scan the possibilities
nothing calls me yet.
I am aware of responsibilities
and these are met
but I’m not laying down next steps
no snares for the future -
I am letting the layers knit.
My friend I have waited
for you to manage your sleep
to share what you worked on.
I’ve read what you sent, thought about it
heard how all of this has impacted upon you.
I’ve offered suggestions
as to how you might approach the tasks
and you’ve ignored them
and continued your research.
this is more important than
submitting an assignment
passing a course
getting a qualification
you said you wanted.
I cannot do this for you.
You work to the bone
which is not required!
And then you miss the deadline.
Your brilliance is not seen.
whether you really want
to remain married.
So much unresolved between you
yet I suspect you do.
“Do you take
into those resolves
with which you walk
in the world of Spirit
community of life
with this person? “
Community of life.
Not Agape though that helps!
Not Philia How wonderful if this exists between you
Not Sex though this holds many together!
But Community of life.
This is sparked by Eros
the desire to weave a life together.
Such a mutual vow
weaves a kite
a basket that holds you both
and holds the abundance falling upon you.
What a performance! Splat!
All your projections out on the mat!
Do you have to have enemies
Did you have use What’s App
to tell everyone my innocent suggestion
was anathema to you?
Well cheers to you!
It is entirely possible have different needs
and different opinions
and still collaborate.
if you attack me in public
subvert my initiatives
or seek to exclude me with malicious gossip
I will simply step out the way.
that others laugh at you.
I am not into making enemies
I’ll walk on by.
Here is my supposition:
as we walk the ways of the multiverse
crossing between the personalities,
roles, loves and griefs of life upon life
in culture upon culture, in place upon place-
if we do not have a firm grounding
in the here and now
know our purpose, here and now
our loves, griefs and responsibilities
we will wander
burdened by griefs
belonging to another age
fascinated by the bards, the festivals,
the joys of other places
unable to bring such riches home.
That is why Initiation
needs long preparation
in every culture
but our own.
You don’t understand
what a deep spiritual impulse I have
to bring people together to discuss these things! “
How do you know that?
I know you love this field.
I know you continually offer your home
as a place for conversation.
I enjoy this.
I haven’t actually considered your motivations.
Why do you suppose I have?
To tell the truth I think your spiritual impulses
are none of my business
unless of course you speak of them!
I think maybe what you are saying is
you would like to share what motivates you
but have not yet done this.
Did you think I was your student?
I am not.
I may learn from your opinions
I may learn from your ideas
I may enjoy meeting others whom you call to discuss these same ideas but I am not your student.
I am not a beginner in your field.
Because I support your meetings does not mean I will agree with everything you say or everything you do!
Even had I been your student
I would not treat you as an infallible guru!
The time for gurus is long past.
The time for collaborative discussion and learning is NOW
All I wanted was a group of peers
a study circle to discuss
the healers of antiquity.
What I got was an enraged response!
Apparently you wanted to own any such group!
The definition of a peer group is that
people who consider themselves peers
might work out how and when to meet and what to discuss
They might stay with texts or explore how the stories echo in their lives according to the preference of the group.
I know how to lead a group
but here I am looking, not for competition or self aggrandisement
but a truely collaborative meeting.
I make an entry about BPD
developed to negotiate
a childhood that was internally unsafe
and too often also externally unsafe.
A sensitivity so often used to recruit people
to their cause
to seduce lovers
to detect weakness
and sell in ways that are not honest and direct.
Every relationship is tested
and usually found wanting when
that other does not support them 100per cent
in an agenda that has never been stated!
And when the support is lacking they crash and burn.
Sometimes they resort to malice, gossip and hatred
so different from the love they want.
I see a wagon load of honey casks;
each is about two feet long
comical with a diameter of about a foot.
They are laid lengthwise in straw
stacked upon one another
in a wooden wagon.
What a precious cargo!
Each contains pure, deep, gold, liquid honey
enough to keep a family for a year
or enough to make honey cakes
for a wedding or a feast!
All of these are now mine
to use for health
to give, to sell
to make mead for mirth:
my inheritance from the Melissae
a pure gift of the sun
for human life
Such a deluge!
a car burst into flames in a crash on the freeway
We did not know this
as we sat snugly in the movies with rainbow popcorn! Afterward we looked for a cafe but they took only cash
we walked on but it didn’t rain THAT hour!
I drove to my studio
you drew and played and I threw away old papers
somewhat concerned at the sound of ambulances
and police with sirens blaring.
We went home early
because there was another major crash.
Safety first little one!
Traffic, dusk and rain are something to avoid.
Great long wooden barrels
nine of them are stacked lengthways
in a sturdy wagon
each full of thick deep gold liquid honey
these are mine
for my life and to nourish the people.
How shall I move them, bring them to market?
I ask where are the horses?
Two magnificent strong horses appear ,
one chestnut brown, one dark brown close to black.
Dark manes and eyes ready to go.
A man appears with an outback hat
He couples a buggy between the wagon and the horses
They are his horses, he drives, I’m amazed-
A transport man from the dreamworld!
Now the wagon is coming up my laneway!
Where to ? he says
I meld into my dream self, let’s go to Freo!
The traffic gives us berth
the horses do not startle as we
pass bakeries galleries and little shops
to reach the Cappunchino Strip
Stop. I say. I go into Kakulahs Sister
I negotiate the sale of some 10 litre pails of honey
to be collected from National Storage
just across the bridge.
I give the horses water and apples
and once unloaded
I pay the man in green dream dollars
They fly away like Santa Claus
I’ll take them to the dream exchange, we’re always there!
when I cannot rest in my hurt
enough to own my ache
that I am not seen or loved
as I love
as I hoped to be loved
and then dismay
dismissal, projections, blame
that I am angry.
This is the healthiest
love I can offer
in the moment of pain.
Yes, we will under and overestimate
and hurt each other without meaning to
but do not turn
from honest anger
it is a sign of true depth
of a deeper level
a deeper conversation
between your being and mine
of what we are crafting here.
Just a little light after relentless rain
I put on a coat against the pervasive damp.
The tussock is bent over
the salt brush is that airbrushed silver
under massive clouds
piled as if waiting for a painter
and the sea is very dark;
but as the waves recede
the wet sand is lit like pearl
and there is also pearl along the sky.
A little boy of two
takes a large stick and speaks firmly to the waves
until they rush toward him and he scampers
back to his mother.
We are the only ones
gifted with this moment.
Foxy Fox News
waited five hours to announce
another Trump associate
had just been indicted
this time for selling state secrets to the Saudis
and acting as their advocate
for some one and a half billion dollars ...
just men of the world, that’s about eight
Barr, Giuliani. the Trump children and five secretaries
should be next...
The headline said he denied the charges
despite phone records videos emails ...
It was up only for an hour
so how will any Trump loyalist
ever know their hero
was duped by not only lawyers but, let’s see
Russia, China, Turkey and the UAE ...
Six pairs of bright socks
one has stripes and two have spots
one is patterned, one is plain
the other pair reveals the Fox!
Finally there was sun today
I put them out the front! Relived I have to say
to have clean Ts and lacy things
Enjoying all the colours play.
My old neighbour was upset
with runnels in her sandy soil
my gutters are quite new, it’s not my overflow
but there’s nowhere else for surface rain to go
I made a little trench for her
she really needs more plants-
I wish she’d watch the colours play
It’s much the the brighter way.
the one word to describe his mother
and clearly she lightens
his tall, melancholic frame
Seeing her in profile
was like looking into the shining sun
She sang of her mothers’ love as she lay dying.
She sang every day.
At fifteen she travelled on her sister’s passport
worked in a factory eight hours and then ran out to play
She loved the man who was willing to walk
her all the way up the steep hill.
He went, she went, In all things all the way.
Content in a cottage at last, they
sat on a sunny bench, lyrical..
Two very powerful women
sat down to breakfast today
cheese soufflé, with gruyere
one assumes coffee or water
What they spoke about was not reported.
One was a quantum chemist
before entering politics
She placed a re-unified Germany
centre stage in Europe
the other started as an attorney
was a prosecutor and is now VP
of the USA.
Should the President not see out his term
she will be the first black, first South Indian, first woman
President, and may in any case win in future.
Angela Merkel, Kamala Harris, salute!
I woke dreaming of the greening
dreaming of the greening
dreaming of the stitching
of the patchwork of our nations
together in a way
our vibrant difference
yet covers all with gentleness
that all can dream of greening
Children run in freedom
respecting that each people might
worship in a different way
have different histories
beliefs and gifts
where none shall be a slave
knowing that all creatures need
to eat and breathe and move
that each should choose
just whom they want to love
and where they wish to be
By day and night I dream
I will never cease
of the greening.
I make dragon soup
first I buy two two tiny descaled crocodiles
each about a foot long
they still have heads and tails
but , like a chicken they have been cleaned
and only heart and liver are supplied in small bags
We that is the relative of the old lady
who is visiting from another town
my old colleague and warrior companion
and I mount the old stairs
The relative is just introducing us
we are here to make some special soup
for later in the day
I have driven from the pier to pick up my friend
in what is also a an unknown city
to our destination
I am slightly horrified
how am I going to make crocodile soup
for a start and what turns it into the divine and life preserving soup
for a venerable old lady who is turning 100 years old today
I have onion
I have ginger
I have celery
some fennel bulb
a clove of garlic
a carrot to cook then remove
a little rice
salt pepper a little of the best olive oil
quite ordinary Ingredients except
for the two tiny naked crocodiles
I put on the fan
and find a sharp knife
I sauté hearts and livers
then declaw and decapitate the small creatures
I’m glad I didn’t meet these creatures
swimming in an estuary
I am sure their jaws could give a nasty bite!
Now I have cut off heads, tails and claws
they are just carcasses.
I know that crocodile
tastes like fishy chicken.
I put the offcuts in one pot with water to simmer
these I will discard
I place the rest
into the stockpot
with water to cover
and the vegetables
I thoughtfully consider
if I should add chilli or bay
I opt for chilli
to go with the shaved ginger
there’s to be something exotic about this soup!
My friend slices up celery and fennel to sauté
a little of the flesh will be served like this with soup poured over it
She isn’t an expert either on making dragon soup
but she gamely tries
and then she clears away.
We scrub the bench
She makes some rose hip tea
The relative comes in
they would like tea too
and the old lady would like to meet us.
I wash my hands
we go to meet
this venerable old lady
for whom we are preparing
divine dragon soup
without a receipe
to mark her 100th birthday
The soup has simmered two hours
I take the little carcasses out to cool
I strain the soup
retaining a little rice and all the broth
I carefully slice the meat
and add the sautéd hearts and livers
and the fennel, ginger and celery
prepared by my friend.
It is lunch time
Is the table laid?
The relative has dressed
the old lady in her best blue dress
She is wearing her pearls
and her diamond ring
given for her engagement eighty years ago
Yes there are roses in a silver bowl
and the best champagne
Triumphantly I bring in the Divine Dragon soup.
The relative agrees to taste the soup
and declares it delicious
The old lady declares that we must join her
after all it is her party
and the cooks must feast with the queen.
We smooth our everyday clothes
and comb our hair
and I bring in three more bowls
of the Divine Dragon Soup!
Such a wonderful way to celebrate
a hundred years of her feisty living!
I am glad I had the courage to try this
and the secret knowledge
are intimately related to winged dragons
They rise up transformed by love
ingenuity friendship and courage.
“Feed My Children!” She said to me
as families filed by..
Her Divine Abundance shines through me
is not needed to make soup!
I have laid aside the armour
of the Dragon Warrior
I don’t need you to see me.
Whatever you want is free.
If people project onto me
their joy or shame
I meet it with twinkle in my eye
or a little joke
If they are enraged
I stand aside
Their shadow is not my business-
If they lie
I’ll just say, “Really?
That’s not the way I see it. “
Would you like some soup?
Its five o’clock
anc the young families are arriving
in mild sunshine
adter a month of solid teeming rain
we are glad
to be on the beach again
A little girl of three is wearing an apricot fairy dress
so impractical for sand! but probably she insisted
she is after all a fairy princess!
Her tall bronzed father catches the ball she tosses wherever it falls
A toddler of 18 months runs and stumbles and smiles
his striped body suit makes him look like a miniature bandit
And all the while the sea smiles
receeding into a quiet sunset
The Tip Jar