10/01 Direct Link
In a society that is in constant contact with visual information, it's unsettling how little the majority of its members know about what they see. Not that they even really see; the lack of knowledge seems to create a state in which the visual information of advertisers simply goes straight to the subconscious. Great for them. But what about us who wish to communicate? Visual information is practically ignored, the message is already known for the most part -- BUY. The underlying messages of sex, inequality, and the condonation of ignorance are not consciously acknowledged, but they're there, and it shows.
10/02 Direct Link
Susan was homely. Her brace filled mouth never offered much in terms of conversation (perhaps my fault). Some said, "wait till she's 16". 16 came, then 17, 18, and that was the last time we saw her, our assessment the same as the first encounter. So why look her up now, Classmates dot com? Why would we want to know about the current situations of ANY of the thousands of people with which we shared the experience of standardized "education"? Curiosity into such matters can only lead to regrets, regression, and retrograde action. Or did I just define the triggers?
10/03 Direct Link
Public library internet access, very hard to deal with. Anyone without a computer to stay up to date, must take initiative. A hard thing to come by... My legs hurt. Flat cities give you the impression it is easy to get around without driving or riding. We are so very lazy and weak. Losing train, tired. No word count, count by hand. Hands hurt. Luckily I am not hungry. Actually a very good lunch. Tofu Sate and steamed rice. Very full. Cannot make thoughts complete. Under pressure, others waiting in line, fifteen minutes up. Deep fried tofu in spicy sauce.
10/04 Direct Link
When I was sixteen my mother made me get a job. I wanted to be a chef, so I went to the closest country club and had an interview. I got the job. The first day all I did was clean salmonella infested chicken breasts. (A child was buried in the walls of the house). The smell was horrifying. A week later I vowed to never eat chicken again - and I haven't since. Eventually I was put at an omelet bar, flipping eggs in front of rich people. I always hoped the extra ham and cheese would stimulate a coronary. . .
10/05 Direct Link
The bus driver only wore blue and weighed three hundred plus. We got to go on "astronaut training" rides like the Moon Jumper and a dark and mysterious centrifuge that I went through twice. In sixth grade my class took a field trip to the Space Camp in Huntsville, Alabama. It pinned you up against the wall of a circular room, and you slowly floated up in it in a kind of "anti-gravity" fashion. We got to stay in these really cool rooms that were cylindrical with bunk beds and tiled walls. I wish I could ride it right now.
10/06 Direct Link
As the grey becomes denser, more thoughts make easy connections with memories. Ignorance can only be excused by a lack of experiences, and unless an individual is raised inside a sensory deprivation chamber, it should never occur. Although, more and more this society is attempting to lock itself inside one. The vicarious experience has become more significant than the real, sensory experience. so you have to ask, how important is fantasy? For instance, how one person experiences a chocolate cake is not the same as how YOU experience a chocolate cake. So why so happy with watching others do things?
10/07 Direct Link
Crudely and in other words, if one thinks like a painter, then they are a painter, and therefore the work they make is painting. I am more interested in breaking down formal categorization than justifying how work fits into specific categories. My personal debate over an evaluating standard has been long since absolved. therefore the work I am more interested in over an other painter, and therefore the work fits into specific categories. My standard has been long since absolved. I am painting absolved categorization if one thinks over the work they make and the work they make is painting.
10/08 Direct Link
Because I have nothing to say, I will waste your time. Because I am wasting your time, I am wasting my time. Because I am wasting my time, I am frustrated. Because I am frustrated, I am angry. Because I am angry, repercussions will occur. Because somebody will feel the repercussions, I will be penalized. Because of my penalization, I will regret my actions. Because of my regret, I will regress. Because of my regression, I will get nowhere. Because I will get nowhere, I'll have no new experiences. Because of no new experiences, I will have nothing to say.
10/09 Direct Link
my first bicycle was
a Kent BMX.

one thing
i couldn't figure out
was how the
meant "cross".

I got it
and a matching
for christmas when i was

the scooter was red,
a lot easier to ride,
and the bike was
with training wheels.

learning to ride it
only took an
in my grandparent's
with my dad.

has always come

but even after the
training wheels
came off,
and were kept in the basement just in case,
(of what?)
i still
the scooter.
it was
a lot easier to ride.
10/10 Direct Link
shouting down a one inch tube is as useful as trying reason on the comfortably content.

every once in a while someone will hear you, but they will only be able to make out sounds, not content. it's impossible to get them to listen any longer than the time that is just under what you require for understanding.

i wouldn't suggest shouting. try speaking through it. pretend you are a ventriloquist and project your voice to the other end. unfortunately what you are saying will probably not be noted since the audience will be so baffled by your vocal trickery.
10/11 Direct Link
93 animals I like better than mosquitoes: rhinoceroses leopards platypuses bears snakes pandas hawks squirrels beetles beavers otters koalas cougars tigers groundhogs octopi house cats herons foxes opossums raccoons flies crocodiles mongooses crayfish alligators cows rabbits chickens sharks zebras water buffalo bison crows seals dolphins humans ostriches hyenas ants bees wolves goldfish aphids goats sheep jellyfish deer turkeys porcupines trout giraffes manatees walruses woodpeckers cobras robins gibbons gorillas fleas cockroaches scorpions orangutans chimpanzees baboons wild pigs iguanas plankton giant squids gazelles doves tarantulas penguins hippopotamuses kangaroos lemurs wallabies chipmunks tornadoes toads badgers weasels lemmings puffins guinea pigs hamsters gerbils rats
10/12 Direct Link
He called his paste dynamite. "Wealthy, highly educated elderly gentleman seeks lady of mature age, versed in languages, as secretary and supervisor of household". Alfred Nobel was the first to produce nitroglycerine on an industrial scale. In 1864 he blew up his brother. He worked hard to improve nitroglycerine as an explosive that could be used in blasting rock and mining. He discovered that by mixing nitroglycerine with silica, the mixture could be turned into a paste. This material could then be kneaded and shaped into thin rods suitable for insertion into drilling holes. He patented his invention in 1867.
10/13 Direct Link
a few things to remember when filming a wedding:

-its pretty clear that you have no idea what these people's motivations are.
-what they want to see in the end is probably the last thing you'd want to watch over and over.
-they will assume you can be six places at once.
-they dont have a clue about your process.
-they will think that just because you have a camera in your hand you know how to use it.

i've urinated three times in the past two hours. it always worries me a bit when i piss more than usual.
10/14 Direct Link
to get a hair cut, the old fashioned way, would mean to give in to some ideal that states you care about your appearance. the fact of the matter is the less you care, the more you get noticed. tell this to your teenage sons and daughters. especially the daughters. they could benefit more, especially since the boys won't listen and are already too far lost. hopefully when the girls stop caring, all the boys will too. or it could go in the direction that the boys care more, maybe so much that humane population control will have to arise.
10/15 Direct Link
last three words. why don't we just not speak. just not speak any words. not speak any words that hurt. words that hurt can create real pain. create real pain by retaliation. pain by retaliation makes for irrational delusions of righteousness. delusions of righteousness infect all of us. all of us think we know what is right. what is right is often subjective to consequences and conditions. consequences and conditions create the ever-changing world. "the ever-changing world", as its term exists, proves the futility of attempting to achieve contentment. to achieve contentment could not possibly happen in an "ever-changing world".
10/16 Direct Link
humped like rabbits in spring, your mother and i.
go straight sixes.
these can be really bad for you and your sawdust removal systems
especially while the taps go haywire in the walls.
so while we were speaking of showing yourself to the elderly,
you should also know that peanuts arent really
that good for
enemas unless youre a four year old
piston with red winged
where ever did you get such caramel pants?
eggs and tobacco juice from camel crickets, thats how the ancient Chinese did it, but what about you?
JCpenney or Sears?
gap or else?
10/17 Direct Link
human babies are fat for a reason. floatation. they also hold their breath instinctively when submerged. humans have hair on the tops of their heads because the young need something to hold on to. female's hair grows faster and longer than males. male pattern baldness is a product of evolution. the animals on the african savannah all have fur or hair covering their bodies. hair is a better insulator in air, whereas fat is better in water. the little hair we have on our bodies is streamlined, so when we swim it all goes back in the same hydrodynamic direction.
10/18 Direct Link
new, adjective,
middle english newe,
antonym old.
having come into being
only a short time ago.
recently discovered, found,
nor previously experienced.
completely different from the old,
the established, the norm.
additional, or just recently established.
rejuvenating, or most recent in a historical succession.
inexperienced, novice.

jack has a new baby turtle.
columbus discovered a new world for jack.
jack is having difficulty with the new ideas of post post post modernism.
jack has discovered a new move.
jack is the new columbus.
after his nap, columbus felt like a new man.
jack doesn't know how to run the copier.
10/19 Direct Link
never could figure out how GW Carter first came up wirh the ideaa for peanut butter. whats worse, cant figure out why they were not boiled FIRST, and eaten roasted next. from brazil originally, the peanut was reffered to as the loop plant because of how the stalks bend over and reroot themselves in the ground to create the seed pod where the nut (which is actually a small meteorite, or legume) develops. groundnut is what they are called in africa, and there are many stews. the term Goober, used in the southern US, comes from the congo word NGUBA.
10/20 Direct Link
Once upon a time, a great Zen master was walking through a sunny pasture. The camel cricket of high hops was predictably fertilizing his pathway as it came underfoot, and the green gold-flecked butterfly of good fortune was hovering high over his unplowed brow. As he approached a dark wooded area a strange chill ran over his bones. He thought to himself, "Perhaps today the forrest hides many traps and treacheries. Perhaps today I ought to take the long road over the mountains, or perhaps I should be content to stay here, or perhaps today I should just turn around."
10/21 Direct Link
once in the land of popsicle trees, i mean they were frosted frozen sentients with fruit, like spring. once, at that place, i sleep for seven years (the time it takes for the planet to revolve around the star. see: earth - one earth year, pluto - 247.7 earth years, here - .0000028 earth years). my back hurt. when i stood, and this took some doing, i could just reach with my tongue the bottom fraun of the popsicle tree i was under. when i licked it, standing on my tippy toes, it melted me back into the ground for another seven years.
10/22 Direct Link

lately i cant seem to. . . i have perfection paralysis. in third grade i read a story about how to be perfect in three days, this kid wore broccoli around his neck.

this magazine, we must print now or forever be lost to later and later deadlines.

sometimes, when i cant make a lick of sense about objectives, motivations, or how zen arrived only moments too late, possession, thinking only of positive material, nothing bad, only good. this never happens since all things are bad, as they are good, but more prevalent this way.

hey, will you let us travel too?
10/23 Direct Link
once upon a time there were two sisters who were identical twins. their parents were bad people with lots of money and they did not love anything. one day the parents decided they were bored with each other and got a divorce. they decided to make things easy on themselves, because they were selfish people, and split all their possessions in half, including the twin sisters. they spent a bit of money on the process of recombining the two halves of each, but not that much, they ended up doing a shitty job, and no one lived happily ever after.
10/24 Direct Link
younger and younger generations are consistently educated not to use their brains for creative output, but for computation and mechanism. imagination is non pragmatic and severely looked down upon. Television and video games, along with internet entertainment, promote complete ideological complacency -- the less the idea that "new concepts can be generated" occurs, the less new concepts that could possibly contend or succeed the old ones will occur. the influence of the wealthy media is all powerful, and they'd be fools not to realize it. but dont worry, their beloved money has never failed to provide their offspring with superior education.
10/25 Direct Link
taking slides is about a much fun as squinting into the sun while basketball players hold your limbs and drop lemon juice into your opticals. though not nearly as bad as typing these hundred words, which is like haunting a movie theatre only on rainy days, and knowing that everyone just doesnt believe, and you dont bother them. well, maybe its more like getting your foot stuck in the propellers of a remote control helicopter that has just enough power to lift you off the ground, smacking your head, your shoelaces tearing and falling again on your already bruised noggin.
10/26 Direct Link
Soccer meeting agenda
october, 23, 2002

-where to play
-what time to practice
-what time to play
-Tshirts? who makes -nick to print-one color
-how many on the team
-team captain?
-name of team
-posters with game schedule, directions

no practices. we're playing on wednesdays, times are preordained by the league. nick has too much to do, and we cant wash the shirts if he prints them. i will make a spray paint stencil. black shirts, white paint. whoever will come. JK smith. the art academy stinks. i will do the poster if jk gets me directions to the place.
10/27 Direct Link
i love thrift stores. here's why. old clothes were made better. they are more durable and last longer. i have many shirts that are now twenty years old and will probably last longer than the ones made today. also, because people are fatter now, the standard cut for t-shirts and many other clothes is much wider to compensate for the changing market. sizing standards (S, M, L, XL, etc.) have changed as well. i used to wear a medium, now it is a small. these days i just look in the boys section of the thrift store for XL shirts.
10/28 Direct Link
a friend of mine spent the whole summer having panic attacks because he realized he was going to die some day. i think i recognized this -- really realized this -- when i was very young, before i can remember -- it seems that it has always been a part of my conscience. such knowledge should be given to the young, rather than censored. maturity comes from knowledge and peer action. maturity is developed accumulatively; a well informed eight year old can be ten times more mature than a misinformed sixteen year old. the older you get the more startling the information becomes.
10/29 Direct Link
i cant paint. i really cant. i can make sculptures, but i cant paint. i am weak. i have an emphasis in painting, but i cant do it. everything i paint looks like a big ol' pile of shit. i have no self esteem regarding my painting abilities. yes, i can paint figures, and yes, i can paint landscapes. but when it comes to putting paint on a surface for the explicit purpose of freely painting, i cant do it. i suck. its harder than youd think. sculpture and three dimensional work comes completely naturally, and drawing is easy too.
10/30 Direct Link
ive heard sick fucks like to decapitate black cats around halloween. ive got a nice shirt. its the kind you love to wear, but you dont give a damn what gets on it. its dark grey. it makes you feel like you're hot shit when you're wearing it. definitely tomorrow. i am good at getting projects done the night before. and quite well, so there's speed and agility. usually amid last minute panic i leave mistakes which turn to anomalies, which complete, excite, invigorate, etc. there's your boldness. now if i could only work on these things within my personality.
10/31 Direct Link
process, like tiredness, is dealt with according to individual needs, and each person has different needs. some might choose to plod along, refusing to give in, when fatigue sets in the reaction being to ignore it. others might embrace the arrival of tire and succumb to its heavy hand, knowing that it is transient and continuation will ensue once it has passed. others yet resolve to more technologically advanced solutions of suppression through chemical interaction, intervention, and alteration. i find that fatigue enables my conscious to be replace by intuitive action, there is no drive to check and recheck myself.