I took M to SGTC today.   We arrived a little early and the line was already to the doors.  I decided to sit in on student orientation. The guy said they have a 99% placement rate for their graduates.  That's goods to know.

After orientation, we didn’t know where to go so we went to MN.  She told us he had to take his placement test before he could do anything else.  Turns out, we had to go home, come back at 1:30 p.m. for that, and then leave and return at 5:30 p.m. for late registration.  Welcome to college.

I called yesterday and moved piano to today.  I did pretty well on my finger power, not so great on “the hardest song in the book” but she let me pass anyway, and bad enough—my assessment as well as hers—to need to repeat Just Over.

I finally put Poseidon in the mail.  I've got to get caught up on these ATC's.  This one was due the 25th.  And I was the last one to mail this time.  My next one is a simple black and white one.  I could have it in the mailbox tomorrow—if I try. 

M asked me why I still play piano so slowly.  I told him it was because I started so late in life, as opposed to as a child like his brother did.  And that I can play at speed in my earlier books.  And that the reason I still take anyway is because I realized I’m learning so much more than just how to play a piano.  I’m also learning music theory and music appreciation.  And I’m still having fun, as is Mrs. T.  What I didn’t tell him is that through this I’ve also learned a lot about myself.

R & I met TC & JT at Sam’s.  We were the first ones there, so I called while we were standing in the front vestibule in case they were already inside.

My guys wanted chicken wings, of course, which JT seemed to think was inappropriate.  I got them anyway.  I slid on the vegetables and bread , letting them do what they wanted, but insisted on the olives.  Her kid told her she had to have some sort of chips, so with that excuse, I grabbed tortilla chips and volunteered R to make cheese dip.  Now I was happy.

We got to Os by three p.m.  The OA team was practicing but the girls and other Eagle candidates had not arrived.  M stood around uncomfortably, so I asked SO to please grab M and give him something to do, even if it was taking out trash.  So he got him and some other guys to help set up the firebowl.   Meanwhile, I worked on M’s display.   AH asked where the others were.   “IDK.  I was told to be here by three, so I assumed they would be here by three.”  So I was designated Mrs. Know-It-All until they arrived.

[Continued] “Oh, no, who is going to be the council person who authorizes this.”  I told them that  TC had asked JN to do it.  I called her to confirm and handed SO the cell phone so she could answer any other last minute concerns.  When TC arrived, she appointed R the job of setting up tiki torches.  The kitchen was full of people so I stayed out and continued working on M’s display, letting the busyness happen around me.  By the time T & C showed up, M was having a blast.  He seemed to be finally “getting it.”

[Continued]  The rehearsal was hilarious.  It helped iron out most wrinkles.  CC got drafted to be Chaplain (he didn’t mind) and assured us that he would gladly defer any SM duties to Mr. BS since he was M’s first SM and mentor.   We asked M whom he would prefer.  Mr. BS.  So it was settled. 

By the time we got back, M & A and RL & CH & JH had arrived, so both families were represented. We chatted until R announced that it was time to go change clothes; we had to be back at Fire Bowl by 6:45.

[Continued]   We went to Cub World, I took the handicapped bathroom, and we each emerged a few minutes later in uniform.  We got back to the Fire Bowl in time and I started taking pictures.   The drummers were already practicing.  W made his way over to them and, after being retrieved by LR a few times, got close enough to be invited to join in.  When he got both sticks in his hand, he tried to run, but we stopped him.  He finally carried them around and sat in one of the drummers chairs until time for them to start.

[Continued]   My camera announced that it was full while I was snapping pictures of my little drummer boy (I’m glad it happened then instead of during the ceremony), so I deleted most of my old pictures.  At 7:30 SO came over and asked me if all my people were here.  I said an emphatic “Yes,” as in, any people who aren’t here by now aren’t important enough to wait for.  Apparently, the other families were having issues with that.  I used to have such problems with punctuality that I know there is no excuse with something as important as this.

[Continued]   The OA did such an amazing job.  AH had really worried that we might not like the outcome.  He even told me to let him know if we wanted to make changes.  I told him, “I don’t know about the others, but you won’t hear anything from me.”  And he didn’t. 

There were some things, of course--they forgot the flags, BC wore blue jeans (I thought TC would lose it), the Eagle kits weren’t prepped and on stage when they were needed, things like that.  But they were small things that kept the ceremony from getting too serious. 

[Conclusion]   I was more than pleased with the outcome.  This plan had come together perfectly.  My fear of doing an Eagle ceremony by myself resulted in an event all can be proud of having been a part.   And my boy came out of it more mature.  After the ceremony, he thanked people without being told to; thanked them in a way that they knew was sincere.  And even BC grew; TC said he was genuinely surprised that the other boys waited for him in order to have their ceremonies together. 

Truth is, I’m not that nice; I waited for TC.

I used to have such problems with punctuality that now I give myself a “Ta Da!”, especially if everyone else is late and apologetic like the girls were Friday at Sam’s and Saturday at Os.  I can also see why E would always try to stop people from telling him their reasons for being late or absent or whatever.  It really doesn’t matter in the long run.  Occasional lateness is understandable, but chronic lateness means there is a problem somewhere. 

With me, I either resented having to go, like to DQ, or I felt anxiety about going, like family get-togethers.

Since R was gone all day yesterday, we didn’t go to church again.  So I finished the Christian History magazine I’ve had forever.  It highlighted some of the “heresies” and disagreements of the early church.  Turns out, this has been going on forever.  If someone had a dissenting opinion and wouldn’t recant, he was summarily excommunicated.  All of the church, including his family, could have nothing more to do with him or risk being excommunicated them self.  Often the guy was thrown out of town to boot.  Occasionally he was tortured, like Galileo, or even put to death.  Mio dio!

M went with R to the Scout meeting tonight.  I’m glad.  I was hoping the fun he had at the Eagle ceremony would inspire him to go back.  And Mr. BS is going and doing a merit badge, so he’ll be taken care of.  The S’s are back, too.  M said, I leave, and they start coming back.  I told him it wasn’t his leaving; it was his dad’s stepping down.  With a new SM, she feels like she can "handle" things better.  But she’s being nice to R.  And he and JB are having fun.    Everything is running smoothly.  

Tuesday, Sep 15, 2009 8 PM to 9:30 PM

Learn the basics of astronomy while viewing the Southern night sky through telescopes and the naked eye…. 229-831-2335.

Jefferson Davis Memorial Historic Site
Fitzgerald, GA 31750

I’d been looking forward to this for months.  I checked the website and it was still listed as happening.  We left in plenty of time, got there in plenty of time.  Nothing.  We even left the park and came back.  A sign there said one had been in August, but I rechecked the website again and it said today.  I’m pissed.

I started to call and jump down their throats about last night but I didn’t want to hear a perfunctory and insincere apology.  They are the government, after all.  Customer service is not a factor for them.  In my “Let’s Look on the Bright Side” I decided that this would count as fulfilling my annual resolution to “go someplace I’ve never been before.”  Now I don’t have to go there any more.  As far as tuition, it cost a tank of gas to learn this lesson.  And since I could prove where I got the misinformation, R didn’t blame me.

Between piano and Jeff Davis, I got R to go with me to the Dollar Tree.  Together we got the stuff for the Scavenger Hunt Swap.  I stuffed the $5 priority envie with lots of extras to make up for mailing it so late.  I then opened the one I had received; only six things, and she paid nearly $8 to ship it.  I showed R.  We did a much better package, in my opinion.

The baby-baby wasn’t coming today since we are going over there tomorrow, so R & I dug in for a quiet night.  Then they changed their minds. 

Right when he got here, W wanted to go outside.  R said, “No, not right now.”  I said, “Why put off the inevitable,” and out we went.  After playing outside with R for a few hours, he returned to the porch and began throwing dog food around.  He does this every week.  The dogs obligingly eat up all he throws.  Then he began throwing it at me while I sat on the swing.

After a few handfuls, I said, “No, W.”  He did it again, and I said more forcefully, “No.  Don’t do that.”  He stopped, hesitated, picked up the bowl, and turned it upside down, watching all the pieces fall to his feet.  Then he squatted down and started crying and murmuring apologetically.  He was brokenhearted.  I almost cried, too. “Oh, baby,” I cooed, “I’m not mad at you.”  R brought him to me and I hugged and patted him on his back, assuring him I wasn’t mad.  We were so much closer afterward.  I never want to hurt his feelings again.

Yesterday we went to T & C’s for supper, then to the Rylander to watch the play, Harvey. 

They had taken home R’s propane cooker Friday since they had fresh peanuts.  They also took M home with them at my encouragement.  We were home alone for the first time in a while.  When we finally arrived, T & R immediately connected over boiled peanuts and grilling techniques. 

The play was pretty good.  It’s about a nice guy with an invisible friend.  The moral seems to warn against being “a perfectly normal human being. And you know what stinkers they are!”

I finally got Athena ATC out today.  It’s not as late as the last swap, but it is late.  I’ve got to get a handle on this.  But sometimes I’m rather indecisive.  Although, when it all comes together I get a real thrill.  Then I send it down the road.

I was sipping my coffee when I had a realization:  the bad thoughts hit me worst first thing in the morning.  The Ed stuff and the Dad stuff are especially brutal.  But I realized that if I think about Bible verses and stories, they lighten up or go away.  Amazing.

I’ve decided this week to try to read and stay caught up on the daily Flymail, just to see if I can.  Each day I’m reading all the new ones and then the most recent old ones.  It is already having an interesting effect.  I am getting up and doing stuff.  I’ve already pretty much established my habit of making the bed, dressing to shoes, shining the sink, and unloading and reloading the dishwasher.  Wow.  I guess I actually do have a morning routine after all.  From “load of clothes, load of dishes, and crisis clean as usual” to this.

Mackenzie Phillips was on Oprah plugging her new book and disclosing a dark family secret:  at age 16 or 17 her father raped her while she was stoned.  It immediately made me think of the rape of CP by FH, and the incest between V and O.  I’m getting more and more how my unattractiveness was a shield of protection.  I had no idea how many pedophiles and perverts I was exposed to.  Of course, FH and his clan knew if they did anything to me and my mama found out, she would have their heads on a wooden stake.

Tonight was the Program Planning meeting at Council and the Troop Committee meeting at Denny’s.  R went to the TC meeting; I went to neither.  Instead, I watched Baby It’s You, a movie I had ordered some time ago because RDj referred to it in his earlier interviews.  He had boasted to his friends about his big role in it.  As it turned out, they cut all his lines.  I watched for him in the background, trying to find him. Then, all of a sudden, there he was, for about two seconds.  His friends call the movie Maybe It’s You.

The troop has a campout at the Boat Club tonight.  R has to work so he cannot go.  He helped see them off, getting home around 9 p.m.  Meanwhile, T & C came and got M since I told them I had University of Scouting tomorrow.  I had discouraged them from coming, since I knew W would look for R all night.  So when they showed up I was kind of surprised.  Then I figured out that it was to be a short visit.  After they left I worked on my two classes for tomorrow.  Then Numb3rs and finally bed. 

University of Scouting was interesting this time.  I got to Albany Tech in plenty of time.  My first class wasn’t until 10:30 a.m. and no one was using my room, so I was able to set up early.  Only problem was, there was no projector.  I didn’t bring my computer or printer on purpose this year since I was trying to go light.  Her computer, as it turned out, did not have PowerPoint so it would not work with the projector, meaning I had to teach using the computer screen only.   But I actually did better this year than last.

At lunch I sat with BS and some lady.  I mentioned to him, “You probably heard that I took a big step backwards.”  He was at the Program Meeting on Thursday.  “No, you didn’t,” he said kind of sternly.”  I looked at him shocked.  “Because for one thing, I won’t let you.”  Okay.  According to him, I didn’t step back; I stepped to the side to give others the opportunity to lead.  I thought about how many others had only lasted a couple of years, TS, GY, MN.  Maybe MC and TC will last longer.  At least until RA leaves.

I have got a big week ahead of me.  M starts SGTC tomorrow at 8:00 a.m.  He is really excited.  My baby is going to be a welder.  His great-granddaddy was a blacksmith, so I guess it fits.  But I totally didn’t see that coming. 

I’ve got piano tomorrow, too, of course.  Then I go to Camp Os on Friday to help with registration until TC shows up.  Then Saturday is the Braves game.  R is already looking forward to it, even though they are no longer in the playoffs.  I think they are still in the wild card, though.

I drove M to SGTC today.  I watched my 18 year old walk toward the door and it stung.  I have put this moment off 12 years, watching him walk away from me into the school building.  And it still hurt.  Even though I know I’ll see him in a few hours.  But I also know that this is one more step in his inevitable journey away from me toward being an independent man.  With T it was so logical, since he was destined to marry C.  I was surprised when they got married, but not that they got married. 

Yesterday Dr. Phil did a story about girls and bullying.  Of course it brought back memories.  Ann Cromer and Teresa Frazier (I think that was her last name, she was more the sidekick).  I think they hated CP and used that as an excuse.  Though bullies don’t really need an excuse.  So I’m not surprised that it is still going on.  And with the internet it is being taken to a new level—cyber bullying is power bullying.  And these moms of bullies just don’t have a clue.  What are they teaching these girls?  Do they learn this by example?